Republican State Legislatures Propose that cables can only identify as Male or Female

MONTGOMERY – Republican led state legislatures in the United States are quickly introducing new bills that will require cables to only identify as a male or female.  Citing the controversial practice of “gender changing” of cables as unnatural and morally reprehensible, republican-led states want to ban its practice.

“There are only two known sexes for cables; male and female.  A male cable goes into a female cable, period.  It’s physically impossible for two male cables to mate,” stated Timmy Sherman, R, Speaker pro tempore in the Alabama House of Representatives.

Cable gender rights advocates, such as Molly Bonilla, think that government has no business in telling cables what sex they are allowed to be.  “My cable, my choice,” says Bonilla, “if my male cable wants to plug into another male cable, so be it.”

Cable gender identities and cable bisexuality have been an issue since the beginning of time.  Supporters from both sides of the argument have turned this into a political issue in efforts to sway voters in the upcoming midterm elections.

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